So there’s a girl you like right now and you’d like to tell her how you feel.
Or maybe someone in a bar has caught your eye and you just have to go and talk to her
If you’re here, maybe you’re a little worried about how she’ll react? And you want advice on how to do it?
You don’t want to freak her out but you also need to let her know how you feel before someone else comes along and sweeps her off her feet.
Today, we’ll go over how to tell her your feelings and when to tell her.
If You’ve Never Met Her Before
If you’re in a bar and see a woman you like, just walk up casually and introduce yourself. Hold out your hand and say, “Hey, I’m John” and smile while making eye contact. Be relaxed, friendly, and confident.
It’s vital that you don’t come across as a sleaze. DO NOT tell her you have a 9-inch cock. She is most likely to call security on you!
Don’t yell something crass in her ear like “Hi, aside from being sexy, what do you do for a living?” She’ll just roll her eyes at you.
If you can make her laugh, you’ve won the battle. But, don’t try too hard to be funny. A few self-deprecating comments here and some witty observations about the DJ there are fine. Then, if the conversation flows, you can ask her for her number.
You MUST Get To Know Her First
If it’s a girl you know, first, be honest with yourself…
Do you really know her yet?
There’s a big difference between a crush and a real connection.
If you tell someone you like them when you don’t know them, it’s going to seem a little awkward. That’s jumping the gun a bit and she might think “What a weirdo.” You wouldn’t go up to a complete stranger and say ‘I’m in love with you,’ would you?
If you time this wrong, though, she could end up avoiding you because she feels awkward around you.
There needs to be a connection between you both. Are you in contact every day? Do you text each other regularly? Does she return your texts? Do you know what she gets up to from day to day? If you can answer yes to all these questions, that’s a strong start. It means that you certainly have a connection as close friends.
But does she consider you firmly in the friend zone or do her feelings run deeper?
If there’s an attraction between you and her, she should reciprocate when you flirt with her. Part of the chase is not knowing whether you like each other or not. So, tell jokes and tease her a little bit. If you just act normally like you do with other people, she’ll have no idea that you like her.
That said, flirting doesn’t mean getting smutty. Don’t be creepy. This will pretty surely make her shut you down. The idea is to do it subtly so that she gets a hint that you like her, but don’t get too full-on.
Ditch the cheesy lines as well while you’re at it. Instead, throw in a passing compliment such as, “I like your hair” but don’t go overboard with something like “You have nice eyes.” Be casual. Compliment on what she’s doing rather than making statements about her face or body.
Above all, be confident and relaxed in your body language.
How To Know If She Likes You
It’s crucial, then, to have a connection with a girl before you tell her you like her. There’s got to be a spark between you both. A lot of guys get confused about whether a girl likes them or not. Friendliness can be mistaken for flirting. If you ask her to hang out and she feels comfortable with you, she will most likely agree. But, if you come across as needy, she might well refuse or make excuses.
You should be able to tell whether she likes you by her body language. If she focuses on you, plays with her hair, and feels comfortable enough to goof around, she probably likes you. If she can be vulnerable in your presence, it’s a good sign she feels comfortable enough to show her real self.
You will see if she is reciprocating by laughing with you and touching your arm every now and then. She’ll be fully focused on you the whole time. Your intuition should tell you whether she is truly into you or not.
How To Say It
Girls want attention but not an overwhelming amount of attention. They want to be made to feel beautiful and special. What you say will depend on how well you know each other. If you’ve only known each for a short while, don’t get too heavy at this stage.
Rather than jumping straight in and telling her you like her, try saying something like “You’re a cool chick, I like your company.” That way, you’re giving her a compliment and making her feel wanted without being needy or clingy. It’s also not invasive.
You want to pique her curiosity, not smother her. Some light-hearted compliments and flirty comments will make her feel valued and beautiful. Nothing too heavy or revealing. Part of romance is the chase. Drop small hints and clues in a casual manner that boost her confidence and her self-esteem.
When you make comments, don’t focus on her physical appearance. So many men try to flirt in this way, and it can come across as a bit too much. If you say, “You have great legs” or “Nice ass!”, it could be a little too sexually-oriented. Instead, say, “Your hair’s looking good” or “You’re talented and you take cool photos.”
Try to make compliments that focus on positive aspects of her personality. This is a valuable key to grabbing a woman’s interest. Women like to feel valued for who they are not what they look like. They still like to be made to feel beautiful and attractive but if you let them know it’s their personality you’re interested in, you’ll stand out from all the other guys.
When To Say It
All too often, couples don’t take long enough to get to know each other. Many take just a couple of weeks before they’re in the throes of a full-bore relationship. If you don’t take the time to really get to know her before you tell her you like her, you run the risk of ending up in a toxic relationship because you haven’t established a solid communication flow between you.
You must become good friends first to gain intimate knowledge of who they are and how you respond. After all, if you’re going to be in a relationship together, you’re going to have disagreements down the line. You want to be sure that you both have a deeper understanding of each other.
The Early Days
You need those couple of months to warm up and just spend time casually to check each other out. If you take the time to slowly get to know each other, you’ll be laying a more solid foundation for a secure relationship.
After A Couple of Months
After a couple of months have passed, you could choose a certain moment and say something that makes her feel really special. Don’t tell them they’re beautiful, or that there’s no one else like them: that’s clich. Instead, tell them how much fun you’ve been having with them and that you’ve been having such a great time.
But, you should point out something about them that you really like, something about their personality. It could be something like, “And, I also love the way you’re always positive” or “You’ve got a wicked sense of humor” or “You’ve got so much time and compassion for your friends, I love how people gravitate toward you.”
Make it personal to an aspect of her personality that you really like. This will draw her in toward you. She will feel as though you truly understand her.
What To Do If She Doesn’t Like You Back
If she doesn’t seem to be flirting back, it could mean she just sees you as a friend. In this case, you should maybe back off a little and treat her as a friend. You can still continue to hang out but don’t start getting clingy whatever you do.
If she doesn’t feel the same way in return, any flirtations or advances will push her away. There’s no point trying to force someone to like you. You can keep her as a friend and show her that you still respect her company as a friend. She will respect you so much if you keep a healthy distance.
You’ll probably be disappointed and feel a little rejected. You might even be tempted to keep trying and wear her down.
Don’t worry this is natural. But, do you really want to be with someone who doesn’t feel the same way? It’s best to keep her as a friend. Keep hanging out with her if you can and support her. In some rare cases, a girl can develop feelings for someone over time. Give her some space. It might happen, it might not. What’s most important is that you look out for your own feelings.
Start working on yourself and keep busy. One day, that someone special will come along.
One final thing – have fun! Keep it light and laugh together so that whether she likes you or not, she’ll always gravitate towards you.